So I don't pastor a normal church. Not in any sense of the word. We have attenders who continually fall back to alcohol addiction, heroin and crack. We have methadone-clinic folks and prescription drug abusers. Our folks sell blood plasma for money. And they show up at church wearing wife-beater shirts with "F*&#" tattooed down one arm and "You" down the other.
Additionally, we have a goodly number of folks who are working through CSA- Childhood Sexual Abuse. Both men and women, young (teenage) and old. None of them are working with kids, just in case you are worried. But they attend Layman.
And then there are the Vow-Breakers. I'm not talking about those who have been through divorce- that can happen to anyone and is very painful. But about those who are married and yet see no reason to continue in the vow. And they come to me for permission, absolution, advice that- truth be told- is just gonna piss them off.
I don't smile and sanction divorce. I believe God meant it when he said he hated it. I don't even flinch as I type this out. Divorce is not an option. If they guy is beating his wife or controlling her every move, she needs to get out to force major life change in him. Regardless. If she's leaving 2 year-olds at home while she seeks another high, he's gotta take them out. But the goal is almost always individual transformation and then reconciliation after a protracted period of separation.
I've witnessed miracles of faith as spouses who were cheated on were able to forgive, their husbands or wives repented and they are now together, happy, living new lives together in covenant marriage. And I've watched foolish people think they needed freedom and tear apart the hearts of wives, husbands, children. All for the lie of happiness that never comes. But the ones that make it...it's just so good.
The addicts keep seeing Jesus change them. As they follow Jesus, they get free. Over and over again. Sometimes they stumble a bit. But when they amputate the things which cause them to fall- friends who worship drugs, for instance- and place their faith in Jesus, miracles happen. Alcoholics learn that although having a beer isn't wrong, for them it is. It's their kryptonite- they can't stop at one. Drug abusers learn to cope without the anesthetizing haze of the high. They get changed.
The CSA victims are different. They're less able to talk about their pasts. More prone to shame and feeling like they can't be loved. And- truth be told- I want to beat the BLEEP out of the people who hurt them. But I'm hoping to start a support group for them soon. One that will meet without advertisement. A women's group for women and a men's group for men. So they can process and heal in Christ. And move towards healthy attitudes instead of the guilt and shame that, oddly enough, mirrors the very same things that religion produces. Jesus doesn't. But religion does.
So that's a snapshot of the church. And yeah- we have some "normal" people, too. But that just means I don't know their junk yet. Because none of us are unscarred by the world around us. And none of us can say we've never contributed to our own scars. But Jesus...he's not looking at addicts. Or CSA victims. Or vow-breakers. He's looking a people created for more. Created in his image, no matter how marred that image may be. And he knows they need him. And he meets with them through many people and places. And Layman is one of those places. And I'm just grateful to be a part of what God is doing...
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